Friday, March 13, 2015

7 years later

Emma,
Seven years. Where has the time gone? It is so hard to believe you would be in 1st grade. Probably on the dance team with Anna. Playing American girls and wearing sparkly clothes. I used to spend hours a day imagining how my life would be with you in it. How different it would have been with you on this Earth. It used to be a healing thought, until one day it wasn't. I stopped thinking of you in every situation. I realized that making myself feel worse would not make things better. I eventually learned to grieve for you without causing myself more pain. Every moment since you have come into my life has changed me. You have changed me. I am so thankful for you. For the time God blessed me to carry you. For the love we have for you. For the strength and knowledge you brought into my life. On your birthday and the day we lost you I feel lucky to celebrate you. You are my baby girl. You will forever be my baby girl. As much as I wish you were here to blow out your candles, I know you are watching us from above. Thank you for the gift of being your mom. I love you more than words can say. Happy 7th Heavenly birthday sweet baby. 
Love, mommy


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